It’s a beautiful day outside. It’s about fourteen degrees celsius (that’s sixty degrees fahrenheit, you yanks), and the weather is gloriously sunny. I can hear the sound of joyous gospel music from the church across street.
Unfortunately I can also hear the sound of my chihuahua crapping on my bedroom carpet.
I should have known something was up yesterday when I let my two dogs outside in the yard to pee and they didn’t come back when I called. This is nothing unusual for my pit bull (who’s a right little stubborn so-and-so) but my chihuahua is a spoiled wee bitch, and can hardly bear to be separated from me for even two milliseconds, especially if it’s chilly outside. There’s only thing that my chihuahua loves more than me, and that is food. When she didn’t come back, I immediately suspected that some moron had thrown bones over the fence into my yard for my dogs to eat. I was right.
I don’t know why people think they have the right to throw shit into my yard, especially cooked bones which can splinter in a dog’s throat and choke them. I didn’t get a good look at these bones but it also looks there’s some kind of spicy shit on them, which is causing havoc with my dogs’ digestion! My pit bull woke me up at 5:00 a.m. whining incessantly because she obviously had an urgent need to crap. Before going to bed last night, I had to clean up chihuahua crap in front of the main door, and there was another little pile of crap there when I let the pit bull out.
And, oh guess what?! There’s another pile of shit waiting for me in front of the door again right now!
All of this would perhaps be mildly amusing were it not for the fact that my chihuahua is shitting blood. Like many small dogs she gets a condition known as haemorrhagic gastroenteritis if she’s stressed out or eats something she shouldn’t. The first time this happened to her it cost me over $1200 in vet bills to save her life because, yes, this disease can very quickly be deadly. I have now since learned how to limit the damage before it gets to that stage (you start by fasting the dog for a day; then, you switch to a bland diet of chicken and rice) but I’m just incensed that some moron should have inflicted this pain on my dog in the first place (not to mention my floors and nostrils!).
Honestly, sometimes I think I just might buy a gun and shoot at some of my neighbours. It would keep my dogs safe, and it would rid the world of a few morons.